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The Latest Jokes - Page 144
I spelled individuality 'individidatity.'
what do you get if you cross a vampire with frosty the snowman? frostbite
Two eggs, a piece of bacon and a bagel walk into a bar. The bagel says, "I'd like to buy my friends here a drink." The bartender said, "I'm sorry, sir. We don't serve breakfast."
What kind of injuries do ghosts get? Boo-boos!
Why did Bill Gates cross the road? To steal an Apple.
what happened to the gay wizzard? He dissapeared with a poof!!
your mums so stupid she tried to put m and ms in alphabetical order
Why did the turtle cross the road? Because he was on the top of the chicken.
The Gender Of Computers An English teacher was explaining to his students the concept of gender association in the English language. He stated how hurricanes at times were given feminine names, and how ships and planes were usually referred to as "she". One of the students raised his hand and asked: "What gender is a computer?" The teacher wasn't certain which it was, so he divided the class into two groups, males in one, females in the other, and asked them to decide if a computer should be masculine or feminine. Both groups were asked to give four reasons for their recommendation. The group of women concluded that computers should be referred to in the masculine gender because: 1. In order to get their attention, you have to turn them on. 2. They have a lot of data but are still clueless. 3. They are supposed to help you solve your problems, but half the time they ARE the problem. 4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that, if you had waited a little longer, you could have had a better model. The men, on the other hand, decided that computers should definitely be referred to in the feminine gender because: 1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic. 2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else. 3. Even your smallest mistakes are stored in long-term memory for later retrieval. 4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.
What is a four letter word that ends with "unt", and has something to do with a woman? aunt
Enter some text (such as a joke, word, or phrase) and find out if Google laughs: Random Joke: A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs for her to do. "Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?" The blonde said, "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?" The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch." A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money. "You're finished already?" he asked. "Yes," the blonde answered, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats. "Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50. "And by the way," the blonde added, "that's not a Porch, it's a Ferrari." Google didn't laugh at this joke, and the joke's funniness percentage is: 0.0000% The joke's popularity is: 0
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