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The Latest Jokes - Page 200
sharks are bad to the cartilage
Why was Jesus scared to cross the road in drag? Because he was a cross-dressing chicken.
I think if sharks could talk they would say jawsome instead of awesome
how do you get piccachu on a bus? you pokemon
what's white and hides behind a tree? a shy milk
I attended a party this past weekend.
After checking out all the well-dressed guests at the party, I spotted an attractive woman (standing alone) across the room. When I approached and
asked her name, She coyly replied... "Carmen."
Trying to maintain some sort of conversation with her, I responded with "That's a beautiful name, Is it a family name?"
"No," she replied. "I gave it to myself, because it reflects the things I like most in the world - cars and men."
Then she asked, "What's your name?"
"Golftits," I replied.
On the other hand, you have different fingers.
Little Johnny watched his daddy's car pass by the school playground and go into the woods.
Curious, he followed the car and saw Daddy and Aunt Jane in a passionate embrace. Little Johnny found this so interesting that he could not contain himself
as he ran home and started to tell his mother.
"Mummy, I was at the playground and I saw Daddy's car go into the woods with Aunt Jane. I went back to look and he was giving Aunt Jane a big kiss, then he helped
her take off her shirt. Then Aunt Jane helped Daddy take his pants off, then Aunt Jane........"
At this point Mummy cut him off and said, "Johnny, this is such an interesting story, suppose you save the rest of it for suppertime. I want to see the look on Daddy's face when you tell it tonight."!
At the dinner table, Mummy asked little Johnny to tell his story. Johnny started his story.
"I was at the playground and I saw Daddy's car go into the woods with Aunt Jane. I went back to look and he was giving Aunt Jane a big kiss, then he
helped her take off her shirt. Then Aunt Jane helped Daddy take his pants off, then Aunt Jane and Daddy started doing the same thing that Mummy and
Uncle Bill used to do when Daddy was in the Army."
so a penguin says to another penguin, "you know it looks like your wearing a tuxeido."
Then the other replys "What makes you think I'm not?"
a magic tractor drove down the road and turned into a field
Enter some text (such as a joke, word, or phrase) and find out if Google laughs: Random Joke: Ol' Fred had been a religious man who was in the hospital, near death. The family called their preacher to stand with them. As the preacher stood next to the bed, Ol' Fred's condition appeared to deteriorate and he motioned frantically for something to write on. The pastor lovingly handed him a pen and a piece of paper, and Ol' Fred used his last bit of energy to scribble a note, then he died. The preacher thought it best not to look at the note at that time, so he placed it in his jacket pocket. At the funeral, as he was finishing the message, he realised that he was wearing the same jacket that he was wearing when Ol' Fred died. He said, "You know, Ol' Fred handed me a note just before he died. I haven't looked at it, but knowing Fred, I'm sure there's a word of inspiration there for us all." He opened the note, and read out loud, "Hey, you're standing on my oxygen tube?" Google laughed, and the joke's funniness percentage is: 100.0000% The joke's popularity is: 3.104
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