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The Latest Jokes - Page 233
Whats a baby buzzard called? A blizzard
chuck norris doesn´t have a watch. HE decides what time it is.
What buliding has the most stories?
A library
What is ET short for? Little legs.
An Irishman walks into a bar in Dublin, orders three pints of Guinness and sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar and orders three more. The bartender asks him, "You know, a pint goes flat after I draw it; it would taste better if you bought one at a time." The Irishman replies, "Well, you see, I have two brothers. One is in America, the other in Australia, and I'm here in Dublin. When we all left home, we promised that we'd drink this way to remember the days when we drank together." The bartender admits that this is a nice custom, and leaves it there.
The Irishman becomes a regular in the bar, and always drinks the same way: ordering three pints and drinking them in turn. One day, he comes in and orders two pints. All the other regulars notice and fall silent. When he comes back to the bar for the second round, the bartender says, "I don't want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my condolences on your great loss." The Irishman looks confused for a moment, then a light dawns in his eye and he laughs. "Oh, no," he says, "Everyone's fine. I've just quit drinking."
Do monsters eat popcorn with their fingers? No they eat their fingers separately!
Why are men like mascara? They usually run at the first sign of emotion!
Three people decide to go out on the lake in a boat; a Priest, a Monk, and a Rabbi. The Priest forgot his water bottle on the shore, so he gets out of the boat and walks back on top of the water. When he returns, the Monk realizes he forgot his food. So he gets out of the boat and walks to shore on top of the water. When he returns, the Rabbi decides he has to go to the bathroom. So he gets out of the boat, takes one step, and sinks.
The Monk - after watching the Rabbi - turns to the Priest and says, "Do you think we should have told him where the rocks are?"
That is punny
castle had one major defence flaw the enemy used to get in through the gift shop
Enter some text (such as a joke, word, or phrase) and find out if Google laughs: Random Joke: A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender says, "You don't want that; you want a Red Rooster! It'll make you fly!" The guy argues and the bartender chugs a Red Rooster and jumps out the window, flies around in a circle and back in! The guy says, "WOW! I WILL have a Red Rooster!" He drinks it down and jumps out the window and falls to his death - Splat! A regular at the bar says to the bartender, "You know, you're a real asshole when you're drinking, Superman!" Google laughed, and the joke's funniness percentage is: 81.6020% The joke's popularity is: 3.903
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