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The Latest Jokes - Page 242
what kind of party does a hamburger go to? A meatball!
what do salad-dressing say when you open the refridgerator-door? Close the door please, I'm dressing
What goes haha plonk?
A man laughing his head off?
Three lawyers and three engineers are traveling by train to a conference. At the station, the three lawyers each buy tickets and watch as the three engineers buy only a single ticket.
"How are three people going to travel on only one ticket?" asked one of the three lawyers.
"Watch and you'll see," answers one of the engineers.
They all board the train. The lawyers take their respective seats but all three engineers cram into a restroom and close the door behind them. Shortly after the train has departed, the conductor comes around collecting tickets. He knocks on the restroom door and says, "Ticket, please" The door opens just a crack and a single arm emerges with a ticket in hand. The conductor takes it and moves on. The lawyers saw this and agreed it was quite a clever idea.
So after the conference, the lawyers decide to copy the engineers on the return trip and save some money. When they get to the station, they buy a single ticket for the return trip. To their astonishment, the engineers don't buy a ticket at all.
"How are you going to travel without a ticket," asks one perplexed lawyer.
"Watch and you'll see," says one of the engineers.
When they board the train the three lawyers cram into a restroom and the three engineers cram into another one nearby. The train departs. Shortly afterward, one of the engineers leaves his restroom and walks over to the restroom where the lawyers are hiding He knocks on the door and says, "Ticket, please."
All these years of phone sex have caught up with me, i have hearing aids
Why are there more rabbits than squirrils? Ever try do it on a limb?
The one who's selling it, doesn't want it. The one who's buying it, doesn't need it. The one who's useing it, doesn't see it.
What is it?
a coffen
a giraffe and his trainer walk into a bar, they sit down have a few drinks and then when they get up to leave, the giraffe passes out on the floor. the bartender looks at the trainer and says are you gonna leave that lying there, the trainer looks at him and goes its not a lion, its a giraffe
A guy sitting at home watching TV hears a knock on his door. When he opens the door, there's nobody there except a snail that had crawled up on the front steps. So he looks around for a minute, picks up the snail and throws it across the fence into his neighbors yard.
Three years later, the same man is sitting at home watching TV and hears a knock at the front door. When he opens the door, there's nobody there except a snail that had crawled up on the front steps. Then he hears a little voice yell up at him. "Hey! What was that all about?!"
How many altos does it take to change a light bulb?
None, they can't reach that high.
Enter some text (such as a joke, word, or phrase) and find out if Google laughs: Random Joke: Time is a great teacher, but unfortunately it kills all its pupils Google didn't laugh at this joke, and the joke's funniness percentage is: 32.6823% The joke's popularity is: 4.885
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