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The Latest Jokes - Page 274
One snail said to the other:
Look at that s-car go.
what did the grape say when the elephant stepped on him? nothing but he let out a little wine
customer was really hassling an airline agent at the ticket counter -- yelling and using foul language. However, the agent was polite, pleasant and smiled while the customer continued to abuse her. When the man finally left, the next person in line said to the agent, "Does that happen often? I can't believe how nice you were to him." The agent smiled and said, "No problem, I took care of it. He's going to Detroit. His bags are going to Bangkok."
A guy walks in to a bar and hears someone say, 'Nice shirt." He looks around and asks the barman if he spoke. The barman looks at him and says, "I haven't said a thing, why?" And the man says, "Someone just told me I had a nice shirt!" So the barman says, "Oh that must've been the peanuts, they're complimentary."
Q: How many doctors does it take to change a light bulb? A: Twenty: one primary care physican to change it and 19 specialists to take it apart and look at it under a microscope.
A traveling evangelist always put on a grand finale at his revival meetings, When he was to preach at a church, he would secretly hire a small boy to sit in the ceiling rafters with a dove in a cage. Toward the end of his sermon, the preacher would shout for the Holy Spirit to come down, and the boy in the rafters would dutifully release the dove. At one revival meeting, however, nothing happened when the preacher called for the Holy Spirit to descend. He again raised his arms and exclaimed: 'Come down, Holy Spirit!' Still no sign of the dove. The preacher then heard the anxious voice of a small boy call down from the rafters: 'Sir, a big black cat just ate the Holy Spirit. Shall I throw down the cat?'
What do you call a sheep with no legs? A cloud
Did you ever hear about the scarecrow that won a Nobel Prize? Apparently he was outstanding in his field!
what's the different between Mother Theresa and Tom Brady? Well he's no Saint.
At his 103rd birthday party, my grandfather was asked if he planned to be around for his 104th. 'I certainly do,' he replied. 'Statistics show that very few people die between the ages of 103 and 104.'
Enter some text (such as a joke, word, or phrase) and find out if Google laughs: Random Joke: What do you call a snail on a boat? A snailor!!! Google didn't laugh at this joke, and the joke's funniness percentage is: 46.6667% The joke's popularity is: 1.176
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