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The Latest Jokes - Page 304
why are pirates called pirates? They just arrrrrr
What goes "clippity-clop BANG, clippity-clop BANG, clippity-clop BANG"?
An Amish drive-by shooting.
why did MTV hide from google? cuz google ate youtube
How do you keep a jackass in suspense?
I'll let you know tomorrow!
What has four legs and one arm?
A happy pit bull.
My work involves multi-tasking and sometimes the phone lines ring all at the same time. I just let the other lines ring because I do have 2 ears, I only have one mouth.
Two campers are hiking in the woods when one is bitten on the rear end by a rattlesnake. "I'll go into town for a doctor," the other says. He runs ten miles to a small town and finds the only doctor delivering a baby. "I can't leave," the doctor says. "But here's what to do. Take a knife, cut a little X where the bite is, suck out the poison and spit it on the ground." The guy runs back to his friend, who is in agony. "What did the doctor say?" the victim cries. "He says you're gonna die."
Six guys are playing poker. After losing $500 on one hand, Smith clutches his chest and topples over, dead at the table. To decide who's going to tell his wife, his buddies draw straws. Anderson picks the short one. "Break it to her gently," they all urge. "Leave it to me," he says. When Smith's wife comes to the door, Anderson says, "Your husband just lost $500 playing cards." "How much?" the wife yells, eyes blazing. "Tell him to drop dead!"
What do you get when you cross a parrot with at catapillar? A walkie-talkie
What sits on a window sill, hums, and mysteriously dies 91 days after you bring it home?
An air conditioner with a 90 day warranty.
Enter some text (such as a joke, word, or phrase) and find out if Google laughs: Random Joke: I had a dream that I was eating a giant marshmallow.... when I woke up my pillow was gone. Google laughed, and the joke's funniness percentage is: 65.8635% The joke's popularity is: 3.697
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