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The Latest Jokes - Page 358
A man in a non-smoking home says, "Well, I think I'll step out for a breath of fresh smoke!"
What's red and invisible?
No Tomatoes
what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor?
"Where is my tractor"
What is the first thing Adam said to Eve?
Stand back, I don't know how big this thing gets.
what do you call a sleeping bull? a bulldozer!
have you heard about the 4 eggs.. ? too bad
My flight was being served by an obviously gay flight attendant, who
seemed to put everyone in a good mood as he served us food and drinks.
As the plane prepared to descend, he came swishing down the aisle and
told us that "Captain Marvel has asked me to announce that he'll be
landing the big scary plane shortly, so lovely people, if you could just
put Your trays up, that would be super." On his trip back up the aisle, he
noticed this well-dressed and rather Arabic looking woman hadn't moved a
muscle. "Perhaps you didn't hear me over those big brute engines but I
asked you to raise your tray-poo, so the main man can pitty-pat us on the
ground." She calmly turned her head and said, "In my country, I am called a
Princess and I take orders from no one." To which (I swear) the
flight attendant replied, without missing a beat, "Well, sweet-cheeks, in my
country I'm called a Queen, so I outrank you. Tray-up, Bitch."
What do ghosts want in libraries? boooks!
Someone mistakenly left the cages open in the reptile house at the Bronx Zoo and there were snakes slithering all over the place.
Frantically, the keeper tried everything, but he could not get them back in their cages.
Finally he yelled to his co-worker, "Quick, call a lawyer!"
The co-worker responded, "A lawyer? Why??"
The zookeeper barked back, "We need someone who speaks their language!"
What did the ocean say to the sand? Nothing it waved!
Enter some text (such as a joke, word, or phrase) and find out if Google laughs: Random Joke: Why does the french dog have a bump on his head? Chasing parked cars! Google laughed, and the joke's funniness percentage is: 100.0000% The joke's popularity is: 4.248
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