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The Latest Jokes - Page 386
My pants
Have ants
My ants
Can dance
The ants
Can't dance
Even in
My pants
A horny mother had four daughters and on their wedding day she asked each one of hem to write home and tell her about their married life. The first wrote back on the second day. The letter arrived with a single message. “MAXWELL HOUSE”. The mother is confused but finally noticed a Maxwell coffee ad, and it said “Satisfaction to the last drop…” so, the mother was happy.
The second daughters got married and after a week she sent home her reply. The message read “ROTHMANS”. So the mother looks for the Rothmans ad, and it says “Life size King size”. And the mother is very happy. The third daughter got married and after a two weeks she sent home her reply. The message read “CITIBANK”. So the mother desperately looks for a newspaper with a Citibank ad, and it says “Fast service 24-hours a day, world wide”. And the mother is extremely happy. Then it was the fourth daughters wedding. The mother was very anxious. It took 4 weeks for a message to come through. When it did the message was simply “BRITISH AIRWAYS”. The mother was so concerned she frantically went through all the newspapers at home looking for a BA ad. She finally found one and fainted after reading it. The ad read “Two times a day, seven days a week, both ways non-stop”.
A dog with his leg wrapped in bandages hobbles into a saloon. He sidles up to the bar and announces: "I'm lookin' fer the man that shot my paw."
a blondy was fired from M&Ms factory for throwing out the W's
How many programmers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, it is a hardware problem.
There are ten pigs inside a fence. Five of them jumped. How many were left?
Answer: Ten. They only jumped.
Why do mathematicians get Christmas and Halloween mixed up? Because OCT 31 = DEC 25
how do you make google laugh? you tell it a funny joke, idiot.
THE DOCTOR A man goes to the doctor and he has a banana sticking out of each ear and corn in his nose. He says, "Doc, I don't feel well."
The doctor replies "Well, you're not eating right"!
what is the difference between a man and a savings bond? a savings bond eventually matures
Enter some text (such as a joke, word, or phrase) and find out if Google laughs: Random Joke: Pain is the sensation of weakness leaving your body Google didn't laugh at this joke, and the joke's funniness percentage is: 35.7513% The joke's popularity is: 4.763
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