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The Latest Jokes - Page 47

 

Just because I have a short attention span doesn't mean I--
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how do you catch a wild rabbit? YOU 'Neak up on it. How do you catch a tame rabbit? Tame way.
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A high school English teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. "Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being there tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or illness, or a death in your immediate family - but that's it, no other excuses whatsoever." A smart-ass guy in the back of the room raises his hand and asks, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?" The entire class does its best to stifle their laughter and snickering. When silence is restored, the teacher smiles sympathetically at the student, shakes her head, and sweetly says, "Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand."
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what do you call lee with no friends? lonelee
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Knock knock. Whose there? Interupting cow. Interupting co- MOO!
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If it were not for the venetians, it would be curtains for us.
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yo mamma's so dumb the took a spoon to the superbowl
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A guy walks into a bar. The other two walk around it.
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Two hydrogen atoms are walking down the street when the first one says, "Crap, I just lost an electron!" "Are you sure?" asks the second hydrogen atom. "Yes, I'm positive." replies the first.
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did you take a bath last night? Why, is one missing?
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What is the difference between the Easter Bunny and an honest lawyer? Some people still believe the Easter Bunny exists.

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