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The Latest Jokes - Page 51
Why did the nurse tell everyone to be quiet? Because you might wake the sleeping pills!
Yo Mamma so fat that when she wears a Target shirt she gets mistaken for a landing device
There are 3 people standing in front of a magic mirror. The mirror gives you anything you desire if you tell it the truth, but you disappear if you lie. The first person to talk to the mirror was a very fat brunette. She walked up to the mirror and said "I think I am the thinnest person in the world." and poof, the mirror gobbled her up. The next person to come up to the mirror was a very ugly red head. She told the mirror "I think I am the prettiest person in the world" and poof, the mirror gobbled her up. Lastly came the blonde. She walked up to the mirror and said "I think..." and poof, the mirror gobbled her up.
2 guys walk into a bar, the third guy ducked
yo mama is so fat that when she jumps for joy, she gets caught!
whats brown and sounds like a bell? DUNG!
You're the derivative of acceleration!
Whats the difference between an intelligent man and bigfoot? Bigfoot has been spotted several times.
Two muffins were in an oven. One muffin says to the other, "man it's hot in here". the other responds, "holy crap! a talking muffin!"
how many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? Black.
Enter some text (such as a joke, word, or phrase) and find out if Google laughs: Random Joke: A husband and wife are traveling by car from Key West to Boston. After almost twenty-four hours on the road, they're too tired to continue, and they decide to stop for a rest. They stop at a nice hotel and take a room, but they only plan to sleep for four hours and then get back on the road. When they check out four hours later, the desk clerk hands them a bill for $350. The man explodes and demands to know why the charge is so high. He tells the clerk although it's a nice hotel, the rooms certainly aren't worth $350. When the clerk tells him $350 is the standard rate, the man insists on speaking to the manager. The manager appears, listens to the man, and then explains that the hotel has an Olympic sized pool and a huge conference center that were available for the husband and wife to use. "But we didn't use them." the man complains. "Well, they are here, and you could have." explains the manager. He goes on to explain they could have taken in one of the shows for which the hotel is famous. "The best entertainers from New York, Hollywood and Las Vegas perform here." the manager says. "But we didn't go to any of those shows." complains the man again. "Well, we have them, and you could have." the manager replies. No matter what facility the manager mentions, the man replies, "But we didn't use it!" The manager is unmoved, and eventually the man gives up and agrees to pay. He writes a check and gives it to the manager. The mnager is surprised when he looks at the check. "But sir," he says, "this check is only made out for $100." "That's right," says the man. "I charged you $250 for sleeping with my wife." "But I didn't!" exclaims the manager. "Well," the man replies, "she was here, and you could have." Google didn't laugh at this joke, and the joke's funniness percentage is: 0.0000% The joke's popularity is: 0
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