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The Latest Jokes - Page 58
What kind of bee gives milk? A boo-bee
Why do divorce cost so much?
Because they are worth it!
If I were an enzyme, I'd be DNA helicase so I could unzip your genes.
what do you call a man with no legs laying in front of your door? Matt
what's purple and goes bang bang bang bang?
a four door grape
People who live in glass houses shouldn't have pet Rhinoceroses.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
So he wouldn't die!
Knock knock
Who's there?
Doctor
Doctor Who?
That's right!
It's raining cats and dogs. Don't step in a poodle!
So, a string walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Hey, can't you read the sign outside? No strings allowed!" So, the string exits. A few short minutes later, the string re-enters with sunglasses and a hat on, hoping that he has disguised his appearance enough to trick the bartender, but it doesn't work. He is once again thrown out. Knowing that he had had enough, the string went and laid down on the nearby train tracks and waited for a train to come and run him over. After a train finally came and ran him over, leaving him tangled and confused, the string re-entered the bar. The bartender asked, "Hey, are you a string?" And the string replied, "No, frayed knot."
Enter some text (such as a joke, word, or phrase) and find out if Google laughs: Random Joke: A pirate walks into a bar. He takes a seat and orders his drink from the bartender. An inquisitive man looks him over, noticing his peg leg, hook hand, eye patch, and trusty parrot seated on his shoulder. The stranger says to the pirate "wow! A real pirate! How'd you get that peg leg?". The pirate responds "a mighty cannonball, blew it off". The stranger, amazed falls silent, but in a moment asks another question "and what of the hook hand?". The pirate answers "Lost it in a duel with another rogue pirate!" the stranger again amazed, notices the eye patch and asks one more question "How did you come by the eye patch" the pirate sighs and replies "My d*mn parrot flew overhead and pooped in me eye!" The stranger, a bit confused, asked "and THAT blinded you?" the pirate laughed and said "Nay sir, but it was me first day with the new hook" Google laughed, and the joke's funniness percentage is: 88.6544% The joke's popularity is: 2.579
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