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The Latest Jokes - Page 80
What are santa's elves called? Subboardinate clauses
Two lobsters are boiling in a pot. One lobster turns to the other and says "We better get outta here!" The other lobsters replies, "Holy crap! A talking lobster!"
If your American before you go to the bath room and Asian when you leave the bath, what are you while you're in the bathroom? European.
Did you hear the one about the crosseyed teacher who was having trouble with her pupils?
I have to go to work everyday! Everyday! I don't know where I was when we made this deal with society. Probably at home, sleeping
Doctor, Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains. Pull your self together!
yo mamma is so poor you have to eat cereal with a fork to save milk
After just a few years of marriage, filled with constant arguments, a young man and his wife decided the only way to save their marriage was to try counseling. They had been at each other's throats for some time and felt that this was their last straw.
When they arrived at the counselor's office, the counselor jumped right in and opened the floor for discussion.
"What seems to be the problem?" The wife began talking 90 miles an hour describing all the wrongs within their marriage.
After 15 minutes of listening to the wife, the counselor went over to her, picked her up by her shoulders, kissed her passionately for several minutes, and sat her back down. Afterwards, the wife sat there speechless.
He looked over at the husband who was staring in disbelief at what had happened. The counselor spoke to the husband, "Your wife NEEDS that at least twice a week!" The husband scratched his head and replied... "I can have her here on Tuesdays and Thursdays."
Why did the blonde fail gym class? She thought a quarterback was a refund!
A foolish man tells a woman to stop talking, but a wise man tells her that she looks extremely beautiful when her lips r closed !
Enter some text (such as a joke, word, or phrase) and find out if Google laughs: Random Joke: what do you call a man with a pile of leaves on his head? Russell! Google laughed, and the joke's funniness percentage is: 60.0462% The joke's popularity is: 4.636
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